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Fifty Ways to Change the Movie
(Told from the point of view of a project manager at a certain little company in San Rafael, CA, sometime in the mid-1990's...)
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              Fifty Ways to Change the Movie
              by Tony Fabris
              to the tune of "Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover" by Paul Simon
              (c) 2004 Tony Fabris

"My vision was too big for its time," he said to me,
"there were too many limits technologically.
I've got this burning need to fix my trilogy.
There must be... fifty ways to change my movie."

I said, "I don't think that's a good idea, dude.
Furthermore, all of your loyal fans will think they're getting screwed.
But I'll concede your point, 'cause no one ever disagrees with *you*,
there must be... fifty ways to change your movie.
Fifty ways to change your movie."

        Ya just clean up the mattes, Pat
        Make a new song, John
        Then ya add some more bots, Dot
        Ya just do as I say
 
        The speeder gets fixed, Rick
        I think we need a new sound mix!
        Just add a launch bay, Kay
        You just do it my way
 
        Ooo, step on his tail, Gail
        Max Rebo's new band, Stan
        Add some blue to Artoo, Stu
        Don't ask yourself why

        Add a new slave, Dave
        The planets need a new shockwave!
        More ships in the sky, Guy
        Kiss the old films goodbye

I said, "those changes are too goofy and arcane.
And I must say... showing Greedo shooting first is really lame."
He said, "You're wrong about that... Han can't seem inhumane,
at least not nowadays."

And then he ordered me to start the work that night,
And I suppose it could be worse, he could remake them all outright.
Y'know it's too bad... ILM can't fix the fact that he can't *write*,
I guess there's... fifty ways to change the movie.
Fifty ways to change the movie.

        Ya just clean up the mattes, Pat
        Make a new song, John
        Then ya add some more bots, Dot
        Ya just do as I say
 
        The speeder gets fixed, Rick
        I think we need a new sound mix!
        Just add a launch bay, Kay
        You just do it my way
 
        Ooo, step on his tail, Gail
        Max Rebo's new band, Stan
        Add some blue to Artoo, Stu
        Don't ask yourself why

        Add a new slave, Dave
        The planets need a new shockwave!
        More ships in the sky, Guy
        Kiss the old films goodbye

Click on a song below for my personal parody songs (not related to Vixy & Tony):

Comfortably Dumb Chip Wonder Lights Dear Bill Max Rebo Band Mr. Anderson Losing My Connection Buggy Software False Alarms at BayCon A Day in the Life of a Straight Guy Fifty Ways to Change the Movie When I Was a Boy: 2100



©2010 Tony Fabris.
98845 hits since February, 2006